2011-01-29

Why Enough isn't Enough



Why? Please tell me..
if you even have the answer -
to me you're like a disease
you make me sick
I should call you cancer..

sorry if I can't please you,
sorry if I'm not outstanding,
sorry for failing to exceed expectations
you're just so demanding -

tell me what you want from me,
or just how to make things better
but to tell you the truth
if you asked, I would never

lower myself just to make you happy
please, don't make me say it twice
you brought this one on yourself,
I'm tired of being nice..

never seen this side of myself
and I'm kinda glad you brought it out
because whatever game you're playing..
this foolishness, I could live without..

and I don't want an explanation,
I don't need an apology..
but if you try this again,
I'll show you exactly what you need -

so quiet down
because right now I'm about to break
congratulations, you wanted more
well, that was your mistake

be careful what you wish for
because it might just come true
you wanted me to make this mess..
I'll make a mess out of you

you know, I would hate
to see you crash and burn
but if that's what it takes
I guess you'll have to learn

the same way that I did
that life isn't always fair -
if you can play games with me
then you better be prepared

for one of mine..
but I doubt you'd find pleasure
this is something I've been waiting for,
it's now or never..

I'm giving you a chance to fix things
you'd be wise to play a different hand
than you've played time after time
...I hope you understand

that if you ask me again
when I'll learn to do things right..
I'll simply turn to you,
flip you off and say goodnight.

Is that enough?

2010-08-28

Things Happen

When they say
better late than never,
I didn't stop to think
that this would mean we're doomed
but at least we'd be together -
and I saw all the warning signs,
must have been the weather
but I paid them no mind, baby
nothing lasts forever...
that's what I was told
but all it took was faith in you
and from that point, I was sold
'cause after digging through the dirt,
I had found gold -
practically melted my heart
and now the burn's cold.
Physically beaten down
and mentally broken
with not another move
or a word spoken,
I thought it was a dream
and waiting to be woken
up, I realized it was real..
you must be joking.
Fuck. It's crazy,
after everything,
you call her your baby,
I asked if you understood
and your answer was 'maybe',
but when you didn't come back
I had a feeling,
you had found your number one lady.
She wasn't me
so I guess I should accept it,
better or worse,
it's over now, I don't regret it
but I wonder, if what we had was something,
you'd respect it -
or would you turn around
and pretend to forget it?

2010-08-09

Tell Me a Story

Tried to pick up the pen again tonight
but my hand shook so much it fell. Again.
Just another failed attempt
at trying to put everything back together,
maybe dreams were meant to be crushed -
and this just proved my point.
It's been a while,
and you thought time to yourself
would be the best choice - you thought...
of course an hour wasn't enough,
here, take the other 23
and don't looking for a shoulder
when you can't dry your own tears,
because you were all about YOU
and now I'm all about ME.
You were always afraid of the spotlight,
too nervous to play our games -
but you gave up everything
just for a chance at appreciation.
Want value? Here's a price tag,
I hope someone thinks you're perfect
because looking at you now,
I realized you weren't worth it.
So much for self-respect, huh?
Apologies don't mean much
when you've heard it time and time again,
and I've tried to make things work
even after everyone warned me.
Maybe it was my fault,
I wish I would have listened,
you were counting down the seconds -
I don't know how I missed it.
You were explosive.
What does it look like -
burnt fingers, empty bottles, clothing everywhere
can you really see the picture you painted?
the mental imbalance doesn't fit
right with me. But I witness
from the outside, knowing I didn't belong
but you begged me, you said
that I had it all wrong.
Baby, you make me sick.
As if you'd get a chance to ruin me again.
Yesterday was what it was and I'm past it -
I picked up my pen one last time
to prove I wasn't nervous.
But the words didn't register as I has expected,
the same I had always seen,
always felt, always loved...
they had changed, not to spite me
but because I was determined to stay the same.